My only hope for 2018

I initially started writing a blog post towards the end of 2017 with life lessons I’d learned throughout the year. And then I go and get the flu and all blog/YouTube plans failed. Instead I was stuck in bed drinking 7342462649 cups of lemon, ginger and honey tea and coughing may way through all 3 seasons of Broadchurch. This year, I decided to scrap that blog post and write something a little more personal and share the new mindset I’m going to embrace. #newyearnewme LOL

Whilst being bed bound, I spent a lot of time looking at the year reviews people were making on Instagram. I loved watching the different journeys and the amazing progression people had experienced. Career changing moments, engagements and even pregnancy announcements. And as there was no fourth season of Broadchurch and I couldn’t leave my bed without nearly collapsing from a fever, I thought I’d make my own.

Last year, I had to put the breaks on a lot of things due to health reasons. I couldn’t push myself as much as I would have liked and often this was very frustrating and got me down. But when I made my review, every picture I chose to share was a happy one full of some incredible memories. I didn’t get my dream role in a Hollywood Film or 50,000 subscribers on YouTube (or even 100, so please go and subscribe and help a gal out yeah?!). But I did go to Wembley to watch my first football match, cut my hair short (it’s long again now and I kinda want it short again lol, classic Marcella), had some of the BEST days and nights with my some of my favourite people in the world AND went on several city breaks abroad. It wasn’t what I anticipated for 2017, and although some days were actually really hard, I left the year with a smile on my face. That’s when it clicked.

I have a few resolutions (being more decisive, ACTUALLY learning to drive, learning to cook more) but my only real hope for this year is to be healthy and happy. Sounds simplistic, and to be honest, pretty obvious. But for a long time, I thought I was striving for happiness, when in fact, I was reaching for goals which I thought would make me happy.

For example, I partly put the dependance of my happiness on having a successful career. And if it wasn’t to work out the way I hoped, I thought I’d be a failure. I wouldn’t be happy. Pinning my emotions on something I have very little control over.

Sometimes people do get “everything they always wanted”. The dream job, the house, the puppy. (Maybe this is just MY dream… but I really want a puppy.) It worked out just the way they always hoped. And as great as that is, it doesn’t stop the world from going round. You might still wake up feeling just a bit “meh” for no real reason. Relationships will still come and go. You will still laugh and cry. Both bad and good things will still happen. So I want to take the pressure off these aspirational things needing to fulfil me. Because I don’t think they are the key to happiness.

Whatever happens this year, I hope I get to smile a lot. Sometimes I’ll cry a lot too (and I mean a LOT as I’m a super emosh person). But without the lows, you wouldn’t get to experience the highs.

I’m going to end this post with a little quote I heard a few months ago, and I haven’t been able to get it out of my head since:

Someone else is happy with less than what you have.

Marcella x

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